Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

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I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

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I don’t buy bullshit

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I understand how hurricane paths work

How do I maintain and care for granite countertops in a coastal climate like Pompano Beach?

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Is it accurate to say that while Donald Trump has "America First" policy, the Democratic Party has "Other nations first" policy?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Will you share your wife? Can she take both of us at the same time?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

What does it mean to live "the 'underconsumption' life"?

I can count

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Have you ever lied to your family? What were the circumstances?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

What disturbed you today?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I actually pay taxes

I have a reading level above third grade

What was the worst spanking you ever got? Why did you get it, and how was it given to you?

I see through liars

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Can being annoyed be a sign of getting angry?

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t cotton to rapists

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Can you show pictures of your penis, big or small?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Why do flat-earth conspiracy theorists believe that photos from space, including those of satellites, are fake?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

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I have complete contempt for fakery

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

How do you feel about the impending end of what Donald Trump calls "the Green New scam"?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I have complete contempt for traitorism

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Why do Indian parents force their kids to do stuff?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I can read

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes